66. Follow Your Freedom and Introducing Body Breaking Free

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This is freedom: you are enough. This episode learn how we are revamping the podcast with exciting new energy.  1. Get on the newsletter: katiekaygraham.com/newsletter 2. And please SHARE it with a friend! If this episode gave you a boost of positive energy, spread the love and share it with someone you love.

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Copywriting Brenna Ellis @brennaellis
Music Karter Brown: @kartergbrown

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Today's episode is epic. I'm so excited to share. We are just like in a revamp, like we're on a mission to just keep improving this podcast because I believe in you, I believe in the essence of love within you, I know that you can change. And so I just want to provide the best content I possibly can. And when I first started this podcast, I was like, I don't know, I'm just gonna put one foot in front of the other and, and see where I can take this. And it's evolved. And it's changed. And we see how the stories with the guests and how their story has evolved. And what were the things that really led them on this path to success, to feel free in their body to heal their perceptions of their body and themselves and be able to step into the magnificence of who they are and the life they want to live. Like that's the yumminess like, that's what we all want. And I think that's the missing link. And you guys, when I first started this podcast, I I feel like I kind of followed in with the, you know what the conversation already was. And that's fine, because I think that there's just so much that's already been here on this podcast that's so powerful. I mean, we've gone through 65 episodes, and we've had so many amazing guests, and I just think there's so much juicy content in it. But I had this almost awakening of you know, the the online space is busy. And there's already a ton of information. And I don't I don't want to give you guys just the roundabout, here's the wellness conversation, here's the new trends. You can go elsewhere for that, right. Like there's a ton of information out there, I want it to be you turn on this podcast, and you get a new kind of energy that's going to travel into your self into your being into your day. That's gonna be uplifting, that's going to make you feel like the brilliance of who you are. That's gonna allow you tap into the wholeness, the I am good enough that it's there, this infinite pool of magnificence. Like Deepak Chopra said that there's this reservoir of bliss consciousness that exists within each of us. And it's there, you got it. It's an infinite pool, like, we can tap into this at any moment. And it's this pure bliss. It's this part of us. That is, we're good enough already. We don't have to try anything. It doesn't depend on this new diet. I'm trying it doesn't depend on if I find this holistic health coach. It is that internal validation of love and wholeness and pureness and joy that's already here within each of us. We don't have to go looking around for it. You want to feel confidence, like it's already there? Like you're, it's within you right now. Like, that's the exciting part about wellness. And that's what I really want to tap into. Look like the ego, the judgments, the fears, like the program, we get into this Undertow of getting sucked into the ego. And it's just our natural like, we're humans, like we're, we're living by habits. And that's just how we function. We're just living by the program. So we need that outlet, we need something to remind us of what's true. And what's true is that brilliance and magnificence and like the truth of who you are. And having that reminder over and over again, allows you to tap into that energy, so you can carry that into your day.

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That's what we want to hold on to. And so I want to just like, keep giving you that energy. And that's my mission. And, you know, I get to wake up and believe in you every day, I believe, in the essence of love within you, and not just like, I feel so honored to be in this place. And we're all here in it together. Like, I'm the same. I'm you, you are me, I am you. And all the listeners are the same, like we aren't separate. The ego traps us in that body identification, which makes us separate, like, I'm different than your body, your body is different than my body, my your blood bubble level all the people, right. But the truth is that we're all spirits. And we all are connected by our shared intention of wanting to find happiness of wanting to find peace, of this beautiful place of deserving and worthiness. And we're all connected here. And this be a community with our intention to heal, because we have the courage to want better for ourselves and our body and the way that we show up. And so it's carrying this higher intention into our wellness, like these are my people like these are our people, like the people here listening, want that higher intention, they want to show up every day and be reminded of that energy, that their body is a vehicle to give and receive love. Who you are, is not your body. Your body is a vehicle who you are, is that essence of truth and love and purpose and magnificence. And that's the place that we tap into. And okay, I've like obviously, I'm like getting into it. But I'm going to talk all about this on this pot on this episode, podcast episode, because I re recorded the intro, one of the intro episodes, and the trailers different now, which I'm not really sure, I feel like if you download it, it's already the old version. But it's fine, it doesn't really matter. But I do want this intro, I want you to hear the new recording of it, if you've already downloaded previously, because I want you to feel that energy and intention of the revamp of the podcast and a messaging and all this newness. And we're just keep improving. Like we're just keep stepping up that ladder, we're breaking that glass ceiling, we're moving up the ladder of breaking it again, like that's what we're here. We're here to keep moving, keep pushing, because I know that you have the intention of and the courage of being on this healing journey. Because you know, deep down you're meant for more you're meant for more than just the program. But just living with these things and these beliefs and these limits and this crazy absurdity of we think that our life is limited by these restrictions. And we need to do it one way or the other way or I want this I don't want this or we wake up with these like either or situations. And that's just not the truth of who you are. The truth is you wake up and you're, you're in this, like, oh my gosh, what is today gonna bring? Like, in this like, wonder and curiosity and you know, like, not my schedule. But like what if something magical happens? Like this soul loves the uncertainty. The ego loves prediction and analyzing what's this, this and this. But this soul like knows that bliss like follow your bliss is in the expansiveness of the unknown have just like been waking up being alive and being like, oh my gosh, like, what is going to happen today? Like, what do we got in store for us baby like, let's go right? Like that's the fun part.

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So tapping into that energy like I couldn't be more excited, obviously. And we're doing new graphic design, which you probably guys see right now. We're doing we did a new copy writing discription for the pod. Carter helped me with some music. And I want to give a big shout out to both Carter and Brenna, and they helped me so much on some of these updates on the podcast. And if you guys aren't part of the newsletter yet, make sure to get on that bad boy, because that's where I get to share all these yummy updates, and introduce you to all these amazing people. Like who knows, maybe someday you want to start your own business or you have your own business. And now you have the connections of Brenna's, like this amazing copywriter, I sent her a ton of info, like I felt like it was a total mess, I felt like I totally bombarded her. And she took it. And within days, it was like simple and clear. And she, like, found my own voice and and I was blown away. So you know, finding people hiring out the work that you're not good at that they're amazing. Like, I've just learned that going along the way. And then Carter, he has been working on this music for the last few months. And we've been changing it up and trying to keep that same vibe, but amp it up. And it's like you guys heard it like it's epic, like it's so it's so good. He crushed it. So big shout out to those guys. But yeah, make sure newsletter like this is where I get to connect. This is where we do our we're gonna do our Q and A's. So sending in some questions. And yeah, I just want to keep you in the loop. I want to keep you informed of what's happening. And all these amazing people that were connected to, we're in it together. So epic, epic stuff. And so the intro today,

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listen to it, if like if it let you up, like if the energy was there, if this like new conversation around wellness is like, whoa, like this girl kind of like, a low whack. And I'm also digging it, share it with a friend, like there's no better way to really amp up this conversation. And we're uplifting each other like, like, I get to sit here and I get to be on the mic. And I get to believe in people like I get to believe in the essence of love. And I get to see it every day. That's reflected 100% back into you. Like, I want you to feel that energy of believing and other people of believing in the essence of love of connecting to the people that you love. The ego keeps us confined and in this like nitpicking like, finding like these flaws, and are your partners or spouses and what it like what is it really like we want our partners to succeed, like we want our friends to succeed. We know this, like our soul knows this, the ego kind of creates these layers that confine that image. But like that's a higher intention in itself showing up for the people that you love believing in them. Like if they're struggling with something, and their body or their perception of themselves, or they're not feeling worthy, or they're just not being able to tap into their truth, like oh my gosh, like, give them something that will light up their life today. Like give them that energy because I promise you, it's gonna make you feel good, it's gonna make them feel good. And I'm no marketer on this whole podcasting thing, but I'm just doing the best that I can to create an impact and new conversation around wellness because I believe in it and you see these people on social media and you know, there's no like blame. But the people that you know, are the most insecure seem like they're the most confident on Instagram. And I want to be able to influence and be advocates for everybody and I just want the whole social media to get uplifted and I want people to feel kind of a new sense of like, yeah, you can do it this way if that makes you feel good and that lights up your soul and and you want your purpose to be in you know x x and x i don't want to give examples because I don't want to like throw anybody under the bus but you know some people want to hold their purpose and what they're eating on a daily basis and how they look and what you know the pictures look like and and that like really lights up their soul so I would never try to diminish that. But I really believe in my heart that most people they want something bigger, they want a higher intention with their body, they want purpose and meaning. And so in order to get out of the program that keeps us locked in those confines of thinking as we need to do that a certain way, there's a different way there's a different conversation, we can be a body that is a vehicle for our purpose, we can wake up with that new intention every day, and align with what's truly important. Like that's the power of changing our perspective of changing the conversation, the more that we can spread that however we can, this podcasts, if you find something else, that's amazing, like, share it, right, like, share this energy, and it'll just show those people that you love them so much. And you want to see them succeed and that you believe in them. Like, that's cool as like, that's, that's amazing. And I know, I've been filled up with that energy. And if you feel that, like you're going to high pitched voice to because it's gonna light up your world, I promise. So, share it with a friend, that will be the best way to support and enjoy the episode you guys I'm just so excited to be able to just keep this going. Keep improving, like what we have is already good. What's to come is going to be more and more epic. So I can't wait to see how we're just going to keep going keep improving. Keep that energy and sit back and you know, grab your coffee and whether you're driving or you're taking a walk or you're laying in bed taken, you know, a half snooze, wherever you're at, just enjoy the bliss of like filling up your cup

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today's episode, I want to introduce you all to the show and why we are here. Who the hell am I? And what is this bad boy all about? So first of all, that intro, what the hell are we doing here? So good, total truth bomb.

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This was a clip I snagged from one of the previous episodes, episode number 64. Five, with Adam Lewis. And so yes, I am re recording this episode number one, the intro, after I've done over a year of podcasting already with body breaking free, because I have some awesome updates I want to share and the format of this podcast is always evolving and changing because we are on a mission to always improve and I really want to give you the best that I got. And you know I'm growing and learning and this is a come with me not look at me experience. So we're on this journey together. And it's this awesome community, we have just a BA community already, I just love the people so much that are here. And they're just having this willingness to change to heal to heal their perceptions of themselves, their bodies, the struggles, the you know, the overeating or the under eating, or the over exercising or trying to get more motivation, all of these things that consume us and the fear in the judgments. And there's a way to break free, there's a way to heal these things so that we can find that ease and flow. And we can find that balance with control. Right, we don't always want to have this massive grip, both hands on the steering wheel, just trying to force our way through life and try to, you know, make like our connection with food really nourishing and loving or make our connection with exercise this amazing and uplifting thing. It's about finding a balance. And I don't love the word balance either. But it's about finding this connection. Right? It's about finding what the soul is really longing for, and allowing the body to be the vehicle for you to give and receive love. Right? There's so much in this wellness space that we're missing a very special ingredient of that connection with self and tapping into that place over and over again, allows us to find what is true within you so that you can be this beam of energy and light. And you don't have to focus so much of your time and energy on the struggle. Right like we're always gonna have fears we're always gonna have judgments. But it's what do we do with that? What are we doing with Those fears, how are we relating to them. And it's more about how quickly we can come back into an aligned place. So I want you to get to a place where you're waking up, you are deciding how you want to live your day. And you're tapping into that spiritually aligned actions so that you can move forward with intention and clarity. And that's when the ease and flow happens. And that was like a big thing. When I first started doing this podcast, like, I didn't know what I was doing, like, half the time, I still feel like I have no idea what I'm doing. But I learned talking to so many amazing people and their stories, and then how they move past their struggles and how they heal their perception of themselves, and got into this amazing place where they're spreading their light, they're spreading their passion. They're, you know, sharing what lights them up, and they're living this life of joy. And so after hearing all of this, I shifted the perspective of the podcast, because, you know, it's not so much about what we're doing. Like what is right, quote, unquote, right, what is wrong? And we get so caught up in the doing part, like waking up, what's my schedule? Am I going to make it to this yoga class? Or am I gonna focus on this eating habit, pattern, or new, whatever new style of eating, it's not so much in that as it is in our energy, and our perceptions of ourselves. And that's the missing ingredient I feel like we can tap into, and having a stronger intention with our wellness. Like that was one thing I saw over and over again, as finding people that were successful in their approach to wellness to their body, was this really powerful intention that they had, and the simplicity of that, so the ego, you guys loves to make everything so complicated. And the ego isn't bad. So the ego if you're new to this concept, and I know this concept gets thrown around a lot. So you might hear something, but not really know exactly what the ego is, the ego is just our five senses. So the ego is just the human form, living this earthly experience on planet Earth, in this one lifetime. And so, the ego can be so magical, because we get to eat yummy foods, and we get a new taste that and we can go to concerts, and we get to, you know, dance and put our arms up in the air and listen to music. And we get to live this amazing, magnificent, like Mary Oliver says this wild precious life that we get to live. And so the ego allows us to experience the yumminess of living this beautiful life. The problem is, is when we are too far into the ego identification, we are literally identifying ourselves, who we are, is the body is the ego. And so when we get wrapped up in that the ego just wants to keep us comfortable. It wants to keep us trapped in our old habits and our patterns and our same thoughts that we repeat over and over again. Because that's where it's comfortable. That's where it wants to keep us. But our soul is craving something new, something wild, something brilliant. We want to find this intention, this purpose and our life, right. And so there's kind of almost this duality that happens. And when we bring awareness to what's going on with the ego, that is when we can start to break free of really attaching on to the body identification with the ego and we can start to bring in awareness. Know what's up like, Hey,

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what's up ego? I talked to my ego all the time, like, Oh, that's a nice judgment. Like, oh, my thighs look fat today. Oh, like, that's great. That's great. Katie, let's, let's come back into what's true. And so it's not that the ego is ever gonna go away and we don't want it to go away. We want to love it. We want to show it some grace. But it's when we realize who we are. We are our soul. We are the spirit we are the conscious observer of our thoughts as humans we we get to have this place in the back of our head that is absorbed revealing our thoughts. And who we are is love. We're this beam of love and light and joy that just is there always Rumi says it's not our job to seek for love. But to remove all the barriers that are on top of it, our job is not to reach for that place of purpose and light and love. It's already there. Right? Like you already have everything that you need to live the life that you want to, that you dream about, that lights you up, even if you don't have a clear vision or picture of what that is just feeling that vibration, like you know that we all know, the truth thrills at what it already knows. Right? So when we hear these things, we just feel this, like softening around our heart space, because the soul knows that this is true, we know that we have this place of love. And that's the place that we need to tap into over and over and over again, so that you can start to live your truth. Like that's your truth, right? You are not your body, your body is a vehicle to give and receive love. Okay, now that I just like truth bomb do multiple times. Let's get into this. So yes, the podcast is evolving, I always wanted to improve, I want to align it so that you can take the things that you're struggling with and radically change in a, you know, in a clear and direct and intentional path. So the more that I learned, the more that we change the conversations and how we're approaching our struggles and what kind of workshops we're offering and online stuff and in person and all that jazz because I really want you to break free, I believe in that love within you. We just need you to start to believe in it. You need to start believing in your self worth you need to start believing and and the potential that you have within those gifts that you have that haven't been nurtured that haven't been seen and might feel lost, right? You might feel a little broken and lost. Like I've been there. Like I've been through it you guys have, I felt the I'm not good enough. I have felt the I'm unlovable. I have felt that grief and sorrow and sadness of loot losing something pieces of me over and over again. And that's what society norms do to us, right? It's not bad. But we are living by these rules in these confines. And we didn't know we were kids, right? We didn't have that awareness. But now we have the awareness. So we can grieve the loss of maybe the identity of ourself and not really tapping into who we really are and the life that we really want to live. And let's move on, right, let's get into this bad boy. Because this is like, the essence of what body breaking free is, is we're tapping into that freedom, that place within you that we can just light up over and over again. Okay, so why we are here, we are here to break free. We're here to break free of our perceptions of ourself. So to break free of your perception of yourself that you don't want to hold on to anymore, right? Like what I just talked about those pieces and pieces are taken away from us. And a lot of the time, we didn't even want to learn these habits in the first place. Like we these are things we are holding on to we're protecting the ego is protecting with this sense of control. And we didn't even want these things in the first place. Like that's like a bombardment of like, oh my gosh, like yes, like let's like throw these into the trash and get rid of them.

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It's so funny. I recently went to this cacao ceremony. And cacao is the ceremonial grade. You know, the cacao chocolate so, but it's a ceremonial grade. So it's it has this pure form of cacao. And I'm no expert on this, but it's this pure form. And cacao was a natural heart opener. And so I was like yeah, sure. Like, I'll try this out. You guys will learn on the podcast. I love just like going to any kind of wellness thing learning like that's my passion. That's my enthusiasm is I just love like nitpicking all these beautiful things they can pick up in the wellness spacing, and all these like trends and different things anyway, so I went there. And I kind of knew what to expect because I had been to a different cacao ceremony. But the other one I had been to was a dance and a static dance and cacao. So we drink Vica cow. And then we did this like dance, just kind of free movement, which for me, I was pretty nervous going in, I actually changed my outfit like four times, because I was like, Well, what like kind of flowy like clothing do you wear to something like this, because I've kind of a rigid, like, I don't know, I kind of feel like I still have that like type a kind of movement in my body. So it's not as like fluid and like going to something like that was kind of out of my comfort zone. But I knew kind of what to expect. But the thing with the dance and that cacao is I didn't really get a tap in, I didn't really feel like I tapped into the cacao that much because we went right from the cacao into the dance ceremony. So so this new time, this new ceremony was drinking the cacao, but then Elaine and meditation and they were playing sound bath and music. And so when I went to this, it was a totally different experience. And I was in the meditation and I felt this like warmth going down into my body. And the thing with a cacao is it's in like instead of coffee, so coffee takes us up and out. So kind of brings us into this heady space. And I'm already kind of a heavy, overthinker person. So I love coffee. But I'm trying to kind of step back from a little bit because I know it's not really serving my purpose and intention of showing up in the best way. But the cacao allows us to sink into the body. So instead of lifting us up and out, it brings us and drops us into the body. So really powerful in that way. And then it said, Oh, I'm gonna say this wrong basal dilator, that opens up the heart space. So it's a natural heart opener. So we kind of like get this body sensation of opening and warmth. And as I was going into this meditation, I started to release some stuff. And I just started noticing tears coming down from the corners of my eyes, and just started to kind of feel like this unraveling. And, and I had been in this kind of healing process for a while. So I had been in this kind of uncovering, releasing Layers of Fear already. But then I went into the cacao and it allowed me to tap into this deeper place within I felt like my soul was opening up. And I heard this little like, little tiny voice in my head. And it said, You are meant to live a miraculous life. And the power of that statement totally blew me away. And I really feel like we all are meant to live a miraculous life.

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And so it's going into those deeper, deeper places within us, we start to uncover these layers of fear. And that's what some of these modalities can really allow us to do as we tap into that deeper place within. And so what I'm talking about earlier, is we're breaking free of your perceptions of yourself. As we start to untangle and unravel parts of yourself that you're holding on to that you no longer want, you are opening up to this immense place within you that is magnifying the truth of who you are. So you're stepping into the magnificence of who you are the magnificence of your life. And that's what some of these modalities can really do. And it's about the modality right what I said earlier is like it's not about the quote unquote doing like that is certainly a part of the puzzle. Like we still have these amazing tools and exercises and ways of approaching our food that we can really tap into and help us release and come back into that energy that we want to feel during the day. Right? We're all chasing a feeling like this is the vibration so we're all trying to reach this certain type of feeling and there's all like these different practices and tools and ways we can do that, we're now approaching those ways with a higher intention of the body as our vehicle to give and receive love. And now we're identifying with the truth of who we are. So it's a whole kind of, I mean, it's not a whole way of looking at it differently. But it's a subtle shift that will create powerful changes. And the reason that I started this podcast is really to believe in the love within me. So I think I started this podcast with a really superficial reason, like multiple superficial reasons, like I wanted to quit my job, just really unhappy. I just felt like my soul was just dying a little bit every day. And so I wanted to start something that would start to create income. And also, I wanted to do something in the wellness space, because I'm so enthusiastic about learning and learning new possibilities and ways of taking care of myself and my body. And it was also as I started to do it more and more, I just want to love myself more. And I wanted to release some of these things that were holding me back of the feelings of, I'm not doing enough, I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy. And so it kind of like forced me into that direction of releasing some of that. And I feel like with anything, it doesn't matter where you start, right, it doesn't matter the super superficial reasoning, like sure, that's great. Like, let's get into it, like start wherever you want. If you want to lose weight, if you want to make more money, if you want to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, like there's 100 Different reasons, I think the important thing is being radically honest with yourself, where you are starting, meet yourself where you are, and then move forward from there. And make sure that you can know that the direction you're moving in is something that your soul is really going to be proud of. And that's like, that's something I saw later down the line. But I knew that I was moving in a direction that was more expansive than where I was at at that moment. And I knew the podcast was going to expand me in a really uplifting and positive way and really attach on to what my soul was longing for. Because I knew I was going to talk to all of these amazing people. And I knew just that was going to uplift my soul. And I could be really proud of that. And, and then as I went in dove deeper into the podcast, I realized that another like another reason or motivation was because I wanted to believe in the love within others. So I've been holding on to this. And this might be like radically honest with you guys, but the fear of other people have. So So in my relationships and the past, I've always been that person pushing away. So it does feel like in a relationship, there's one person that has a wound of

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abandonment, so they're always kind of needing and pulling the other person. And then there's another person that has the wound of manipulation and taking something from that person. And so it's a, it's a pushing away, it's non attachment. And I really believe relationships are brought together because they're meant to heal. Relationships are here to help both sides heal. And so it makes sense. My, my therapist told me, she was like, all the couples I see or other people I talked to in relationships, the other person is has the direct opposite wound as the other person, like were brought together with having these opposing forces and we're here to heal them. Like we're here brought together to heal them. So like just find that so fascinated, but that's been my hardest struggle, like that's the place that like deep down. I have always felt not good enough. And I have always felt me pushing people away. And I have had this immense fear of somebody taking something from me hat controlling me, manipulating me. So I've had to build up these layers of protection over my heart space and, and so on, like through the podcast and uncovering this If I realized that I didn't believe in people, like I wasn't, I wasn't believing in the beautiful power of love within other people, because I was layering myself up with these walls of protection.

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And so now I am so lucky, I feel like I get to wake up every day. And instead of asking, What do I need to do today, I say, what do I need to heal, and I get a wake up and I get to connect with all of you, I get to connect with the guests. And I get to know that I'm waking up, and I'm believing in people's love. And I get to see it and prove it to myself over and over and over again. And so that's really why I'm sticking with a podcast is I just feel so honored to believe in others love within them, and just the brilliance and the powerfulness of what that means and how I can see that and, and how I can cosign with the universe, to believe in the possibilities and capabilities and other people. I'm not here to tell you what to do, I'm not here to give you a step by step process, like a lot of other people do, and the coaching and, you know, the wellness, and here's your diet, here's your program, here's the outline, like no, that's not my job, my job is to believe in the essence of love within you, and help you see that. So that you can bring in your own healing powers and your own capability of putting one step in front of another, to show up for the magnificence of your life and who you are, and tap into that energy because it's there. And so that's another thing that's different with this podcast is we tap into that healing power within you and build up that confidence. And especially with the body, if we're looking for confidence with the appearance of our body, I can guarantee you're really looking for the confidence within yourself. And so we'll get into that more and more, we'll tap into what's the external and what's really going on in the inside. Because once you radically change your internal space, this will reflect directly into radical external change. So as we heal the inside and our perceptions of ourselves or body, this will reflect into radical external change, right? Like I, I have been through every diet under the sun, and I wanted to lose weight so bad for so long. And I have this notebook, I still have it in college of me just writing down every single thing I ate. And then the next day, I would go back to my journal I'd read, okay, I ate, you know, handful of almonds. And then I had like a turkey sandwich for lunch. And then the next day be like, Okay, how can I improve on that? Okay, I won't have that handful of almonds today. And I'll exercise more. And it really was this narrow view of my life. But it wasn't from a wrong intention. I wanted to feel good. I wanted to show up in this confidence and look sexy and feel good in my body. And so my intentions were not wrong with it. But the way that it narrow focus, my life really made me feel suffocated. And I fell into a deep depression. And every day I would wake up with anxiety, like, feeling that day. I mean, I have so much. I know so much of us struggle with that. So it is such a common thing to deal with. And, you know, society directs us in that way. It tells us to approach our bodies in that way. And so we're just trying to do everything, right. We're just trying to do the best that we can. But it wasn't until I finally started addressing my internal space and started really loving myself and knowing the truth of what was underneath it, that I could start showing up in my life. And it wasn't about the weight, right at that point, the weight would just fall off. Like it didn't. I mean, I'm not saying like I would just like woke up and I was you know, 30 pounds less but I'm saying that when I found that internal perception of healing myself and my body, the external goals of what I was seeking and how I was wanted to feel and the weight I wanted to be at like that just happened on its own. And that we're not told that in society we're not told Well, that's how we gotta approach our goals. And we got to be motivated. And we got to have a successful plan, right? This is what we're told, we're told to compete, we're told to do better, we're told to look at everybody else as separate than us. And so that's when we get wrapped up in the drama of the ego.

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We get wrapped up in the judgments, and the comparison, my body is more special than your body, or your body is more special than my body. And it's this roller coaster, this hamster wheel, we will always feel inadequate if we're rested in that place. And so we just got to make a little two degree shift and realize, okay, like, this is the approach I've been going towards, I can forgive myself for going down that way, because this is what I've been told to do. I was just trying to do everything right. I know my heart's in the right place. But now I know, okay, I gotta have some perspective shifts, I gotta change my perceptions over and over again, I gotta tap into that place of energy and alignment. And I've got to wake up and change my thoughts, like, what is my ego telling me? How can I be in that place of awareness. And that's where radical change starts to make a huge difference. And that's why the podcast is such a brilliant outlet for us to tap into that place, because you can just be hanging out in your car and listening and things will start shifting because your perceptions are changing. Like, that's so cool. Like, that's so cool. So the podcasts like, is a great place that we can connect to that truth and start to change our mindsets. And start to actually make some real radical changes, and it will reflect in your external life. And I want to go back to so I just told you that I went through that time of depression and anxiety and a lot really comment, a lot of us struggle with those same thing. And this is when our perception is so confined and narrow. And that's when we feel stuck. Right? That's when we feel like ah, like, I feel so way down. But I don't know how to change, I don't know, what's the next right step. And our world is just getting smaller and smaller, because we just have this confined view of this control. And this, it's like this cycle of, here's my fear, I don't want to feel that feeling. Okay, let me come into an example. Because this might be easier. But we reach for a cookie, and we eat the cookie. And then we think badly about ourselves, we have all these feelings of guilt of shame. And so we decide, okay, I'm not going to eat that cookie next time. So you build up this layer of protection. And then you start controlling, building these controlling habits to not eat that cookie, right? Or you build up like for me, like I build up this control of overexercising, like my day is not going to be good, unless I exercise today. But that made my life really small, right, you can see how our perspective starts to get more narrow, narrow, narrow, or as we start to build up these layers of protection and control. And what's underneath it are these deep seated feelings, that we're not giving ourselves permission to feel. And we're so afraid or So living in this fear, we have totally lost

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perception of what's actually happening. And idea of what's actually happening. So the uncovering of all of this is healing is really this journey of healing and getting out of this small container. Because like I said, you're like this beam of light and love. Like, let's step into that, let's get into that energy. And as you start to get into that energy, you guys, this is important as well, the universe energy, that vibration matches the vibration of the love within us. So as we start to I don't know if you're into that manifesting, but that's what it is it reflects, and this is a direct correlation to the Hertz to the vibration. So we start to reflect that with the universe. And then we start to step more into the flow and alignment of the universe. And that's when manifesting our desires happen. And that's when we feel like a sense of ease and spontaneity and things pop up and it's like, oh, yeah, like, Sure, I'll do that. And like, oh, yeah, that totally aligned. ends with what I want to do and how I want to feel. So it's like, we tap into that healing place. And it is a healing journey. And that's the really the purpose of why we're all here, bam, in a truth bomb you again, that's what it's all about, we are here to heal, we are put on this earth to heal ourselves. And then we're meant to radiate that healing outward. So we can only control ourselves, we can't control other people, we can't force our partner to heal, we can only take care of the healing process that happens within us. But once we heal, that will radiate out to the people in our lives out into our relationships. And we don't have to force anything here. All we need to do is be in the brilliance of who we are in that healing. And people will see that. And once they are able to receive that because we all want that, right? We all want to be in that heart space, we all want to be in that essence of love. Their souls will start longing for it. And they'll be like, hey, what do you what have you been doing? Right? It's not me forcing like, Okay, you gotta meditate, meditate, meditate every day, like, that's what you got to do. It's like, oh, I'm meditating every day, people are noticing a shift in my energy. And they say, what, like, what are you doing, Katie Kay, like what's like going on, and you say, oh, like I've been meditating. And they'll get that hit of like, oh, maybe I should meditate, I want to be in that feeling. So that also gives us like, oh, this big sense of relief, because we don't have to bring on the healing of other people. Like, we just gotta, you gotta just worry about your own healing, like, this is your own healing journey. And we're all meant to be on that journey. And once we heal, that is when we start to step into our purpose, once we're able to release that time and energy and consumption in a struggle. And we start to slowly start to release these layers, we heal, and we get to this place of magnificence that we're able to step into our purpose. And we're able to give more, we're able to love more, we're able to serve more. And one other truth bomb is that you can be in the healing journey. And you can be in your greatness at the same time. Let me just say that, right, you can be in the healing journey. And you can step into your greatness. Like that's important to know, because every day you already have that essence of love and purpose within you. It's just tapping into that place and finding that reminder over and over again. And that's when you're in your greatness. And you can still be healing at the same time. One thing I heard once was pain, without purpose is suffering. And pain with purpose is power. And that's how I feel like we all show up in a way to serve and to give and to love.

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When we take our pain, wherever you're at, meet yourself where you are, whatever you're struggling with whatever you've struggled with in the past, your pain is powerful. Right? Your pain within intention is power. And that's that higher intention for our wellness and our body. So you need to forgive yourself and move on girl because you got to show up in your brilliance. Right, it's time it's time to see your pain is such a beautiful gift to this world. And if you're even if you're in the mud right now, if you're in the pain, it is still pain with purpose. If you can attach on to that higher intention of I want to heal because I want my love to shine out from myself. And I want to be in a place where I am giving service to others. I am loving more. And it doesn't have to be job or like it doesn't have to like be your life. It's not about the doing. It's about showing up in that energy of who you are. If you're giving love more love to your family, to your friends to the strangers at the grocery store, you are healing with purpose. You're healing the world in just that way. Right and not just but in that way so powerful. Right when I was depressed, like I couldn't lift my head up sometimes I couldn't even get out of bed. But I couldn't look at people in the grocery store and give them a love and a smile and give them that energy, maybe that little hit that might make a little difference in their day. You know, I couldn't give more to the people that I love to my relationships. I was so stuck, I was stuck in the mud. But that pain, it's only suffering if we just let it be without any intention without any purpose. But now, you have a higher intention. Like that's what we're all about, like, that's body breaking free. We're breaking free so that we can show up in a meaningful way. Boom, okay. I'm, like, really like this episode one is because being longer than I thought, but so fun. Okay. So what, like, I talked about who I am, why I'm here, I just like believing the love. And that freedom, okay, we got to tap on to this freedom, because

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it's so good, right? It's so like, that can be our purpose. Okay, I want to like one final thing. For the episode, as I just want to share this story. I was going to this Full Moon flow, this yoga class, and one of the local Studios has a full moon flow every month. And I had missed like, all of them, and I hadn't been. And so I was like, Okay, I'm gonna go and do this. So I signed up for it. And, and I was like, the day of I was like, Ah, just like having one of those days, I was kind of down and out, didn't have a ton of energy. And the full moon flow was later in the evening. And my bed time is like nine o'clock. So I'm kind of a nerd in that way. But I was like, Okay, well, you know, I'm not gonna get home till late. And then like, I'm gonna go to bed late, blah, blah, blah, you guys know how that cycle. Like, I do it this way. And this is the way it needs to be done. And if something is interrupted in that cycle, like all hell is gonna break loose, but it's not really right. So it's like, okay, and you and you know, like, I'm so enthusiastic about wellness and doing all this stuff. And it was kind of strange that I was in that mood that day, but I just was, but I went to the thing anyway, because you know, I sign up for something I'm committed, I'm not going to not show up. And so I went to this full moon. And we did this beautiful yoga flow and meditation. And at the end of this ceremony, we were writing our intention on a piece of paper. And so, like, after doing the flow, and then meditation, I was in this place of clarity and alignment and just kind of sinking into it to my soul space. And so I wrote down, I want to be free of anger. Because I feel like my, I've had chronic back pain for so long since I was a kid. And I felt that anger was holding on, I had shoved that anger down so deeply. And nothing major, right, just, you know, not feeling like I could express my emotions and trying to hold it all in for so long and being the good girl and.

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And I just kind of like I think I just really, like pushed that anger into my body until it represented and manifested itself in a somatic way in a physical pain. And so, like, for so long, I had wanted to be free of this pain, like, I mean, if anybody here listening that deals with physical pain on a daily basis, it will be the it is the hardest thing. Right? It just our relationship to it can change. And I and I have with mindfulness with MBSR it's like so profound. So if you want any insights on that, please email me message me on Instagram. But in that place of pain, it can just be the hardest, like the most defeating the most hopeless. And so I had wrapped up so much with this intention, and so much grief and sadness for just living a life and pain is like there's so much grief there, right? There's just like, I've protected myself from doing certain things because I didn't want to hurt my back and, you know, I've controlled certain things because I needed to feel good and so I wrote that intention. I want to be free of Anger. And we put it in, she has this little flame, this, this little candle that we put that intention in, let it go. And then we were supposed to pick up these two cards. So she had these card decks out on the floor in the center of this Full Moon ceremony. And so there was about 50 cards per deck, or could have been 100 cards per deck, who knows. And so I picked up the cards and I knew like I have this weird feeling like I knew what cards I needed to pick, you know, like, sometimes I pick a card and I'm, like universe, show me what you need to show me like that. It's just like, do this and I get it. I'm like, Cool. But that time I was like, okay, like, I saw them. And I was like, That's it. Like, that's easy, like, whatevs. And then I went back to my yoga mat. And they were, like, overlapping, right? So one card was in front of the other card. And so I couldn't see the second card. So I looked at the first card, and it was an eagle. And it said freedom. And oh my gosh, you guys my, like, shoulders dropped, right? It's like, oh my gosh, it's so amazing. Like free like freedom, like it's. And another thing I want to say is like, I I was thinking before, this is an important part of this, right? I was thinking before this ceremony. I was like, you know, the universe just gives me these like little baby subtle nudges, like, and I feel like I kind of live my life and like a very subtle way, like things happen. I'm like, oh, like, okay, I can look back at it now. And see, that was significant, but it was just like, little subtle things. I'm like, yeah, like the universe has never really like, shown me something insane. And I'm very much a numbers person. So I see, like numbers with a time and I know those little hits of like, okay, like, it's good, like, the universe has my back. But um, yeah, it was just like, Yeah, whatever. There's, like nothing big has happened. So picking up this freedom card was like, so shocking. And then you guys, I split the cards, the second card said freedom. Both cards said freedom from two separate decks, the chances of that picking that one word, that one word shows up once in each deck. And I just burst out into tears. Like, that's what life's all about, right? And I have this podcast body breaking free. That alignment of helping other people break free. And feeling that freedom is so significant. I think it just like it was just a reinforcement of this is it like this is the path. And it was so huge. I told my husband after he was like, oh, yeah, cool, like, but those signs are so

1:03:31

like, they don't happen, right? That doesn't happen. Like it's so crazy to me. And whether you believe in a higher power the universe or like your higher self, just your higher self, however you want to whatever you want to believe in, like believe in yourself, right. And then if you want to, like expand that out into the universe, or God or however your think like your higher source or power is, you know, we're all here, living in this human body. And the body struggles are here to show us where we need to heal in our soul. And we have this source of power within us, the universe, whatever you want to call it, that is this magnificent source of light and energy and something that we can tap into, where we don't always have to rely on our own strength anymore. Like we're all doing the best that we can, right? Like, we wake up and we do the best that we can and that's all anybody can ask for. And it's those little baby steps of healing and moving slowly, like a half step at a time and the direction that you want for yourself in your life. And knowing like there's something guiding you there's something there supporting you that you don't always have to just be so strong and just have everything figured out. Right? Like, there's strength and having belief, belief in yourself belief in your Higher Self that's there that's guiding you that's supporting you. And the more that we can drop our shoulders and release into that space, the more that we can feel supported, the more guidance that we have, and the more love that we can feel. And I just want to make that point. Because it's something that will guide you on your healing journey. And just feel that like, energy of love that surrounds you always, you always have that. And we're all humans, right? Like, again, like, you don't have to be perfect, there is no perfect, like, Oh, we're gonna get on this podcast, we're just gonna crush these limiting beliefs, like that's what I love to do is break them down. Because we've built them up, like, we've learned them from society, we've learned them from our parents, we've learned them from our friends not to blame any parts of those. But we have, like all of these sources of information. And the people that we learned from, they have their own wounding, they have their own trauma. And we can see the love and light in them, we can see them with compassion. But we can also know that now we have choice and power to choose how we want to move forward, how you want to move forward with your life, and what you want to hold on to what you want to let go of, not sweat breaking free is. Okay, last thing, you guys format of the podcast, this is integrating, changing our perceptions. Obviously, we're gonna have amazing guests on the podcast, I really want you to be a part of it. Like, this is an experience. This is a community. We are here to support each other. This is not just a one woman show up on the mic, you know, like, email me telling me like, What are the things you want to hear on the podcast? What questions do you have? Maybe there's a person that you really admire, and you want to have on the podcast, like we're gonna do the best that we can to get those people. And yeah, let us know, maybe there's like something like, Oh, this is standing in my way right now. Like, reach out to us. Because if you don't ask for help, it's just going to take longer, right? You need that support. Like, there's a saying from a that I read once in a book that I love your best thinking got you here. Right, your best thinking got you here. If you believe in the love and truth within you and that your heart is pure, and you have good intentions, which I 100% know is true. Then you know that okay, like my best thinking got me here. So now it's time to surrender and have that support have that help. And that's another reason that guests are on the episode not just to give us advice, but also like their business, right? Energy work, therapy,

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breath work, breathwork intuitive eating, like, there's so many different modalities, and you just have to listen to your soul and be like, Oh, that sounds interesting. Maybe I'll start following this person and reach out to them for help. But like my words here are saying, email me like, let us know talk to us on the podcast, what are you struggling with? We'll be doing Q and A's on the podcast. So any kind of updates, get on the newsletter like this is going to be where you get all the info on the podcast, all upcoming workshops, all q&a, all of that that's where community hub is at. I'm talking about workshops, integrating the experience. So what I was talking about doing the cacao ceremony and doing this full this Full Moon flow, like having those modalities being able to experiencing it like taste it a little bit and see like Oh, like that really resonated with me. And then having that higher intention of oh, that helped me tap into that space of truth within me made me feel this kind of energy like that's a little nudge Shep telling you to move in that direction. So this podcast we're an offer more experiences, like being able to come together and try out these different modalities in an in a heart centered way in an open and intentional way. And yeah, I just I just so happy that you guys are here. Thank you for showing up. Like thank you for being on this journey and having the courage to show up Open, want to be a better person and tap into the life you're meant to live like, that takes courage, right? Feeling that connectedness of the podcast of all the listeners, like all thinking about this community, like the connectedness of all of us here listening, our willingness to heal, like that is strengthen itself, right? The desire of all of us to want to heal and move forward together. That's, that's powerful. And the more that we can go beyond the separateness, right? We're not separate. And at the core of everything, such a beautiful way to end this episode is any disease that we feel any struggle, the core at all of it, is because we forgot the true nature of who we are. We believed in the separateness and the truth of who we are, is that love within us. And that love within us is that connectedness within all of us, we are all connected. We are all separate waves, but we're all of the same ocean. And that essence of love and peace and happiness, the things that we truly desire. Each of us desires. We all share those same desires. And that way, we are all connected. So feel into that. Right? That's what your soul has been longing for. That's what the body's been telling you. And that's what's really going to help you break free. My Ma My name is Katie Kay, this is the body breaking free podcast. I am so happy that you're here with us. I will see you next week.